A Non Paying Customer

The horrors of real life won’t allow me to add a long, well thought out post today. With that in mind I’ll give you a preview of what’s to come, then leave you with another writing sample; this one from The Lost Pages of Trevor Sunburn, and I warn you, it’s not for the kids!!!

Coming up is a discussion about my disgust with 90% of remakes, and CGI VS practical effects, and I encourage you to comment and stir up some debate in these dreaditorials. I’ll also be reviewing some older, obscure horror movies I feel you should demand you check out if you haven’t already.

Well the lawn isn’t gonna cut itself, so here’s a sample from my experimental horror/adventure/sci-fi/black comedy/surreal novel, The Lost Pages of Trevor Sunburn, which will be up for sale along with Dōguhn in the not too distant future.

And he took a hit to the crotch, causing him to slump against the wall of the subway platform, doubled over in pain. An argument was commencing somewhere nearby, but all he could concentrate on was the shot of pleasure shooting to the impact point like lightning, joining the pressure in his balls; that and the next kick that was surely coming any second now.

He paid her twenty bucks, ten for each kick. The bitch didn’t ask why. She just took the cash, laughed then kicked him in the nuts. With tears of pain running down his cheeks he braced for the second kick, but it never came. At the other end of the platform, the argument grew more intense and the bitch turned her attention away from his crotch to see what was happening.

Some drunk was having himself a little piss on the floor and a pig apparently wasn’t too happy about it. The cop didn’t notice the smell of his rubber soles melting when the drunk’s piss pooled up around his shoes. Next anyone knew, the drunk aimed up and splashed the pigs face with steaming urine.

Almost immediately the poor cops face began to sag. Seconds later his skin fell off in stringy chucks. The muscle underneath was sizzling away like it was being deep fried and the pig fell to his knees with a cracking sound. A moment later he was nothing but a steaming pile of bones with handcuffs.

As the pain in the man’s crotch subsided, he turned to find the girl had run away and all he could think was fuck, now I won’t get that last kick.

Stories like that could be heard from all over when “God” decided to take a big shit on the world’s chest and then titty fuck it.

My name is Trevor. My last name’s Unruh, but you probably don’t give a fuck about that. You’d probably be more interested to hear how I got the name Trevor Sunburn. Sure, I’m a pale bastard not unlike a vampire, and my skin looks like a lobster with a flesh eating disease if I spend too much time in the sun, but that isn’t the interesting bit. I won’t spoil it for you though. We’ll get to that soon enough, so just sit back and enjoy the ride.

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2 responses to “A Non Paying Customer

  • danmoxham

    Really enjoyed reading this. Keep up the good work. D

    • thelivingdread

      Hey, Dan, thanks a lot. I really appreciate the kind words. This novel’s actually complete, I just haven’t done the submitting yet (or self publishing preparation, should I go that route). I saw that you’re into bizarro, which is awesome! I was actually thinking of submitting this to one of the Bizarro Central publications and sent a query, but they weren’t looking for novel length manuscripts.

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